You gravitate most to the limiting self talk character called the Orphan. Once healed, your new name is the Beloved.
The Orphan feels a deep sense of abandonment and rejection. Sometimes that stems from a parent leaving or a divorce when he was young. Other times it was friends rejecting or ridiculing him in him school years. Or it may be patterns of romantic relationships, friendships, or relationships with leaders not working out in adulthood.
The Orphan's limiting self talk is often centered around shame, a foundational belief he is not worthy of love. When people in him life try to love him, he often filters their actions with "rejection" glasses. He struggles with focusing on what is missing in him life instead of what is in front of him. He has often been an innocent victim in the past but will now choose that role if he doesn't think there is another way to get love.
Examples of Limiting Self Talk that the Orphan narrates:
- If they really knew me, they wouldn't want me any more.
- At my core, I am not important or valuable.
- I am only loved when I love first.
- I'm so afraid they will leave me.
- No one understands my pain.
- I will set out to prove that I am not lovable. (Even if it is completely untrue.)
- Even if I am with someone, they will never understand me. I will always be alone.
Foundational Fears: Rejection and abandonment
Redeemed Gift: Our greatest weakness can become our greatest strength when healed. When you overcome your shame narrative, the gift you will bring to the world is unconditional love for yourself and others and a tenacity to love until the end.
The Path Toward Hope: We can become a compassionate observer of our inner landscape and notice when these thoughts arise. We can ask the Orphan why he is showing up at certain times and bring healing to him.
To get over your addiction to LST (Limiting Self Talk), make your thoughts NEW.
Notice and Name when you have thoughts that are rooted in feeling rejected and unworthy of love.
Envision what you would feel like and how your life would change if you replaced that thought. How would it feel to believe that you deserve to be loved? How would your life change if you stopped setting out to prove that the people in your life don't really love you?
Whirl that negative thought around 180°, generating a positive thought to replace the limiting thought.
180° Thought: You are loved in the deepest parts of who you are, even your weaknesses.
Inner healing assignment for the Orphan: Write a letter from God to the Orphan. Ask God to give you revelations about how he sees that part of you. What would he say to comfort him? What does he love about him?